The ever so famous Greg Young.
As he is the one that will guide you
through this convoluted mess.

(The Cool New Thing)

Joke or Stupid Thought of the Day

The Autobiography of Myself

Pictures From Various Locations

Sound Files and Information

Music and Stuff

Insight on Issues

Links to Other Pachydermic Websites

Greg Young's Plump Guestbook

The Forum for the Hippos and Rhinos




  • Darren's Uncle's Wedding - Though this event may seem like it does not belong on the events page, it had a much bigger impact on the past year than just Darren's uncle Jim becoming a married man for the second time.  Around the time that Darren left for the wedding, he was already relatively good friends with Cassie.  He had found himself talking to her on the phone quite a bit, often late into the night, with school the next day.  For the wedding, Darren left Phoenix for California, where it would be held.  The wedding itself was boring and uneventful, side from Darren's mom forcing him to do the twist with her.  He stayed in California for a few days, and during that time, he and Cassie had emailed each other about twice a day.  Most of the emails contained messages of "I miss you," "I can't wait for you to return," and the like.  One of the emails caught Darren's attention more than the others.  Cassie informed him that she had found a temporary substitute of him in Cameron.  She had been calling him and talking to him, though not as much as she talked to Darren.  Darren took this as good news, because Cameron had never had any female contact like this before, and he might have been heading in the right direction.  What did this event trigger?  Instead of just Darren and Cassie being friends, a triangle was completed by adding Cameron.  These three were inseparable for a time; a great friendship that changed the entire year for Darren.  It can even be said that this even could have been the event that lead to Cameron and Cassie dating for the short period of time that they did.  The unity of Cameron and Cassie led to many of the heartbreaking events later in the year.  Some of these events are ones many want to forget, but they can never be forgotten.
  • The Jog to Erica's House - After I attempted to get my permit and the DMV hassled me, I decided to spend my Saturday night at Darren's house.  When I arrived, he was wearing his glasses, something I had never seen before.  During the night, all we did was play really stupid Shockwave games, until I got hungry and I asked Darren for food.  We looked into his refrigerator and we found generic desserts.  When I mean generic, I'm talking about desserts in plain white boxes with black writing on top of them.  Regardless, the treats were very good.  They were so good that I had around six, and my stomach was hurting a little bit from eating that much mini luxury desserts.  After the desserts, we found ourselves chatting on the Internet with Erica George, a female in my English class and our History class.  She was apparently bored and suggested we visit her.  Darren informed me that she lived really close by, and we could jog there if we wanted to.  I did not have much time, so I called up my mother and told her to pick me up half an hour later than I had previously told her.  That gave us roughly forty-five minutes to go to Erica's and come back.  We quickly printed out the direction to her house and we were on our way jogging.  It was quite a long jog for someone that is not in shape, but we made it there with around thirty minutes to spare.  This was the first time either of us had seen Erica outside of school, and she seemed different.  We showed her Raccoon Man, and took pictures of it with her.  Then she brought her stuffed animals that we also took pictures of.  Before we left, she brought out her fat cat, which I found amusing because it was large.  She sprayed the Raccoon Head with a vanilla scent so it smelled good and then we noticed we did not have much time.  We started to run back to Darren's house, so we could reach there before my mother came to pick me up.  On the run home, I dropped the camera, and it did not seem to function anymore.  That was the death of the camera.  For the next three months, I would be without a functioning camera.  This is one of the impacts of this night.  Without the camera for three months, memories could not be saved, and a whole lifestyle seemed to go down the drain.  It felt like all we did when the camera was around was just play with it, but now that it was not there anymore, it seemed like we were missing out on some great pictures and great fun.  Other than that, the obviously trigger from this night was our friendship with Erica.  We had not previously seen her after school before, and realizing she lived near Darren and jogging to her house was a great way to get to know her better.  And hey, she probably would not have been able to spray the Raccoon Head and make it smell good (it kind of smelled like Darren) if we never jogged over there.
  • History Review Sheet - At the end of the first semester of Sophomore year, our History teacher gave us a review sheet that all exempters needed to complete if they wanted to exempt.  He made it clear that you would take the final if you showed up the day of the test and you did not have a complete packet of answers to the review sheet.  A bunch of my friends and I thought we could get together and share what we had, so we asked him if it was okay, and he said just as long as we were not turning in the same work.  I first talked to Jacques about how he did not have an Internet chat program so it would be hard for us to communicate with each other.  Then I thought we both could post what we had on my newly acquired forum, because he had access to it.  Soon, we had about five or six of our friends visiting the forum to post what they had.  Later, I passed out a slip of paper to everyone in my History class to visit the forum and to contribute, if they had anything.  Julia was the first person to ever post anything regarding the History review sheet, but she never posted afterwards.  In fact, many people visited the forum but never actually contributed.  By the time the finals came by, everyone who needed a copy of the review packet had one, and they were all more or less the same.  Not exactly the same, because that was against the teacher's rule.  After the finals, Winter Break passed and then the second semester started.  The forum started to become a place for where answers to homework could be posted, and I am thinking that it really all goes back to the History packet.  The forum had to have spread from some people in school, and the only logical way would have been through the people in my History class.  That is why the packet is a quite influential homework assignment, if not the most.  It indirectly started the Scandal, one of the most troublesome days of the rest of the school year.
  • Buddhism Video - In our History class first semester, we were required to complete a presentation about a topic we picked at the beginning of the year.  Darren and I both picked the Buddha, so when the time came to create a presentation, we banded together to make a joint effort.  The teacher let us do this, and he said that we would get one grade for the both of us.  When Darren and I started to plan out what we were going to do for our presentation, the idea of making a video came to mind, because we both found the Chronicles of Raccoon Man amusing, and we wanted to make something a little bit funny, but educational.  We told each other that we would record on a Friday, and that we would have a few guest appearances by Raccoon Man himself.  On the coming Friday, Darren got a ride home with me, and on the way back to my mother's house, we stopped in the Burger King drive-thru.  I had borrowed a costume from Jacques for use in our video, but I decided to wear it when we proceeded through the drive-thru.  The attendant either did not see me, or did not care at what I was doing, so they did not acknowledge the fact that I looked like the grim reaper.  But anyway, we returned to my mother's house to pick up the video camera, and then we went back to my father's house to film.  We slowly started to plan out our video, and then we found it easy if we would just read off of my book review (that got 100%, mind you) while the other person acts out what I am saying.  In our first scene, we tried to depict a priest, and the best way to do that was to have Darren wear a sheet.  His right hand was not able to function when he wore the sheet.  During one scene, we showed a glimpse of Raccoon Man, just ot live up to what we had said before.  Each scene had its unique costume or set, but something that was catchy to the eye was the use of stuffed animals.  Because of the low budget of the movie, stuffed animals were used to take place of second and third actors.  Once we were getting close to finishing, it was already around eight, and Darren needed to leave to go pick up his friend Ronnie at the airport.  He was visiting for the first time since he left Arizona.  Before Darren left my house, he stuck a stick under my top bunk, which I kept there in remembrance of that day.  It is known as the Sup Stick, because SUP is written on one side of it.  Later, I recorded the video on to a VHS, which was used to be shown in class.  The teacher told us not to be funny, but we were naturally idiots when it came to this stuff.  I showed up to class wearing olive drab, the costume the Buddha used in the video.  The set of our presentation was that Darren was a researcher that had interviewed me for a few months, and in that time, he had created a video to help students better understand Buddhism.  When we played the video, we tried our hardest not to laugh, but it naturally came out, because there were so many inside jokes.  Regardless, the teacher still liked our performance, especially when we got the crowd to meditate with us.  This presentation was the first time Darren and I worked together on a school project, something we would do many more times in the future.  Also, it was the first time he came to my house by himself, another thing that would happen often in the future.  I mark this as the first time Darren and I really showed that we could be friends sometime in the near future and that it would change a lot of things between us.  Beyond that, this video was always referred to whenever we needed to laugh about something, perhaps creating a whole new video for History.  Many aspects of the second History video were modeled after the first.  A lot of jokes were taken from the video itself, and now are used a lot just for laughter.  And also, if Darren never showed up that day to make the video, my grandmother would have never met him, which means that she never would have said that "he is big build."
  • Greg Pohlmeier and Kyle Gerlach - Finally we come to the first people on the countdown.  I decided to add people to the page because there are a few dynamic individuals that have changed so much.  Anyway, on to the two individuals I have put on this page.  These two friends of mine were once just acquaintances when I was hanging around John Cloud, but when he left, I started to become better friends with them.  Everything either of us did, the other two were usually there to hang out.  It was kind of odd because we never really become best friends, but rather just hanging out because we all felt like we could be friends.  We never did though, and we parted ways.  There is one thing that is certain, if I never knew these two individuals, event 100 would have never happened.  Now, I know that the event was not at all influential, so I have more to say.  When I knew and hung out with Greg and Kyle, they were the only people that I could relate my life to other than Darren (which is a reason why I became friends with him).  It made life easier, and when I look into the future, I am seeing a unity of Kyle, Darren, and Greg once again, something that can change everything.  Life when I was hanging out with these two was much different, for example, doing stupid things during the day, never the night.  I did not use the Internet as much, because I did not need to.  As I look back at it, I also think that this lifestyle was caused by them, because of how we did communicate.  On top of just hanging out, it was also keeping on the John Cloud legacy by completing Can Mountain (Kyle and I did that) and fondling with websites (Greg and I did that).   Most people do not know, but there are some contributions Greg has made to the site, and they cannot be forgotten.  There are too many to list, mainly because he was one of the original visitors, but I think it is somewhat understood.  Okay, I think that may have sounded like a jumbled mess, so I will some it up the best that I can.  Without Greg and Kyle, there is no remembrance of the early parts of the year, in fact, there is no first semester.
  • The Chronicles of Raccoon Man - Late into last summer, Vinay left his video camera at my house after a band practice.  John came over the next day, noticed the camera and told me that we should make a movie.  We started talking about what we could possibly make a movie about, and he said something about Raccoon Man.  It was a stuffed animal that I had in my room and he thought it would be funny if we used that as a "costume" and that the main character would be a serial killer.  We planned out most of the things we wanted to do that night, but we pretty much forgot everything.  All I remember is that I told him to come to my house the next day morning.  So, he did, but he told me that before we started to make the movie, he had to go to Albertson's Wells Fargo to cash his paycheck.  There, I bought a donut, while he bought a bunch of cookies.  When we went to the Wells Fargo, we waited in line for around forty minutes until they finally decided to help us.  The guy was a very giddy man, and he ended off the conversation by saying, "A-Team, I love that show!"  John wore an A-Team hat, but it was not referring to the show, rather the skate group, so the guy's line made us chuckle.  Once we were ready to leave Albertson's, we headed back to his truck.  While he was entering his vehicle, he noticed that he had a toothbrush in his pocket.  We both found it odd to have a toothbrush in one's pocket.  Regardless, we made our way back to my house, where I had the hardest time eating a donut (I had spacers, and they are not fun).  John ate most of his cookies until he had the idea of using the cookies for a part in the movie.  We decided that the first scene would be the intro of all the people Raccoon Man had killed, serially.  We hung Bart, squished the Vikings' bear, and suffocated Pinky.  Actually the bag that was used to suffocate Pinky was the cookie bag John got from Albertson's.  The intro scene carried on, and then we went outside to shoot everything else.  Raccoon Man's victim ate a cookie (hence the reason for saving cookies), and the stunt double was Sylvester.  During one part of the movie, we used John's toothbrush that was in his pocket.  I guess I could not ruin the scene for everyone, so I will not tell what we did with it.  The movie was honestly completely stupid, but it got many laughs out of a lot of people.  It is the favorite movie of all that I have made, and it probably is the trend-setter.  When we were done, we watched it a few times, and congratulated ourselves on a job well done.  The movie became a hit instantly, when Vinay saw it.  It inspired the movies we made later that summer, and definitely inspired the Buddha video.  Other than just videos, the Chronicles gave a name to the Raccoon Head, and without it, there are so many stupid things that are lost.  The Chronicles also inspired some random acts to happen, mainly first semester happening, but those are long gone.  The Raccoon Head is a prized item now, and all because of that.  But beyond all, the Chronicles of Raccoon Man is a link to the past.
  • The Light Hits AJ - Oddly, there is not much to say about this, because there is not much I can tell.  Over the past school year, I saw my best friend change from one person to another.  The cause of this is somewhat unknown, but I sometimes think that it may have been his schoolgirl crushes that changed him.  I do not know how that could be better explained, but I think that it was when he was actually looking forward to a possible future, he became softer.  At the beginning of the year, he was the normal partygoer, having the attitude of sliding school and having fun.  By the end, instead of just having fun, he was being responsible, something that I was laughing at because it sounded funny.  But really, it was hearing something like that from him that really made me realize that he actually does think about his actions.  And yes, maybe more than any of us now.  Seeing him mature over this year was maybe something that I was able to witness more than anyone else, just because I had been there through everything.  Standing here at the conclusion, I am definitely proud of his maturity, and definitely proud of him.  I do not know what else I could elaborate on, because there is much I cannot share.  I can leave the story part at this, he has excelled to a higher level than he was at.  On influence, it may be nothing to most people, but to me, seeing him the way he is now, is much better than what he was months ago.  The thing that hits me is that I was seen that he can solve problems, and that he knows how to make decisions.  It really showed that he could do what he put his mind to, instead of half-assing the important assignments at the end of the year.  Beyond all, I realized that he can be a deep person when he needs to, and he can express what he feels if he has to.  I know what he has been through, he knows what I have been through, it is a mutual friendship that I am proud to have.  And to you AJ, it has been five hard years, comrade, but it always gets better.
  • The Closure of Misled Johnny's Really Lame Webpage - Very late into Freshman year, John started a webpage that was like a journal.  It was the funniest page I had been to for a long time, just because he had a sense of humor different from everyone else I knew.  The page was not at all hard to program, but it had content that kept its five visitors coming back.  He vented every secret he had onto the webpage, it was his way of getting things out.  After a while, he realized people that he did not want knowing his secrets were visiting his site.  He made up some weird, lame excuse for closing down the site, and he said that he would keep it up if five people told him to.  Because his visitors were devoted to his site, they responded to his request right away.  So four people told him to keep his site up, and the last person left was me.  The problem at the time was that I was literally dead and I could not use the computer (see event 73).  He never got  response from me, and in conclusion only got four people to respond to his request.  Therefore, he could do no other than to close down his site, which he did.  The actual closure was not significant at all.  At the time, people really did not care an excessive amount.  It was sad that we were to never see the humor that John could churn out ever again on a webpage.  His site's five visitors then needed a site to leech off of, and that became mine.  When I look at it, I think it was the closure of John's site that led me to my first visitors, because no one really cared about my site when John's was around (but his was not around for too long).  I also have confined this event from reaching any higher spot, because I think that even if I did not have my first visitors, the site would have still become popular.  I would not have liked the site as much though, because it holds memories of last summer, and it is based on my first visitors.  Other than changing the site and bringing the first visitors, the closure of John's website brought a beginning to whole "journal of stupidity" type deal.  His site was the first I ever visited that displayed that sort of architecture, and it really influenced my own site.  Sometimes I hate to admit it, but my site was not original; I stole my idea from his site.  At least the joke part, because the rest has been stuff that I think up only in dreams, or something.
  • Rhonda Tubbs - At one time, just a person in my Freshman English class, she became a recurring theme throughout Sophomore year.  At the beginning of the year, she was just a face in Biology, and I would sometimes talk to her.  She had connections with one of my good friends, and so that is why I talked to her a lot during those few weeks.  By the time November had reached, she was erased from the whole tableau.  I did not really see an instance of her scratching at the slate until February of the next year.  I hate to admit it, but she was a really bothersome character during those few weeks, but she really did turn out to be a good friend.  In fact, I learned so much from her, that I decided to talk to her about everything.  Yes, and that is the reason why she is on the events page.  There are two totally unrelated events that led to the final outcome.  Both events have been listed here and are above fifty, at least.  I would not tell which ones they are because that would infiltrate some secrets I want to keep confidential.  But anyway, other than what she did, she gave me tips on life (which, mind you, helps a lot), and started to turn the Phoenix Soap Opera into a positive situation.  Maybe it is hard to see this from my point of view, but if I did not meet her, there would be a few gaps in the timeline of the year we call Sophomore year.  And what exactly would those gaps be?  I guess the Autobiography is waiting to tell you.
  • Joining FBLA - During the first week of school Sophomore year, I was looking for a way home on Wednesdays, because my mother would leave to Las Vegas and she could not pick me up.  I had one friend that could drive, and that was John, so I asked him if I could get a ride every Wednesday.  He told me that Wednesdays were FBLA days, and he would not be able to drive me home.  I dropped the idea then, but a few minutes later, he tried to convince me to join FBLA, because a lot of math was involved.  Apparently, they took tests to see how well you place among other FBLA members.  One of the tests was strictly math, and John knew that I could do well on those tests, because he placed third at the last convention.  At first, I did not want to join just because I did not want to put up with all the things I would have to deal with when it came to clubs.  I do not remember why, but John then said something that got me to join FBLA, and it had to do something about how I could pick up an officer spot almost instantaneously.  I thought to myself, if I could be an officer that would be cool, but there would be a lot more work involved.  John then told me he does absolutely nothing for FBLA and that he just slacks off.  I think that got me, because I did not want to do any more work.  Later, we started to campaign for Gomez to be FBLA's mascot, but that failed when Mrs. McNealy (the sponsor) thought John was insane.  During the first meeting, we discussed possible official positions, and I campaigned for all four.  It was slightly sad when I lost all of the four elections.  John really wanted me to get an office, so he begged Mrs. McNealy to make another officer spot that I could fill.  To my surprise, she agreed, and she opened the Parliamentarian spot.  I easily won that election, because by that time, everyone who wanted an official spot had one.  Or everyone felt bad for me, because I had lost all the pervious elections.  Anyway, the first few meetings showed absolutely no work for the Parliamentarian, so the meetings were fun and easy.  Once John left town, FBLA became a good way to waste time and I started to become more and more attached to the meetings.  At one point, I was literally falling in love with them, so to speak (see event 42).  It was also FBLA's website that gave me ideas for my own (which will be discussed later on the countdown).  The reason FBLA falls down the list of events is because during second semester, I broke away from the club.  I was under hellfire by the administration, so I never liked to stay after school.  I barely ever attended the club, and when I did, it was only for a few minutes.  I made it to new officer elections, and got elected Vice President, a job I hopefully can keep, because I did not play my part as Parliamentarian during Sophomore year (not like there was a part, anyway).  FBLA changed a few things during the year, but those things changed life drastically, if I recall correctly.  There is still more FBLA events on the way, so let this be your foreshadowing.